It’s hard to believe this is my reality. My wife, Julia, and I had wanted kids for years. So, when she finally got pregnant last year, we were thrilled. I wanted to be the best husband and future father I could. Her father had never been involved in her life, and my brother isn’t the most involved dad. I saw too many problems up close when husbands were absent, and I was determined not to make the same mistakes. However, just a few weeks into her pregnancy, everything started going downhill.
Julia stopped wanting sex. “I just don’t feel like it, Mason. It’s too much right now,” she would say. I understood it was due to hormones and stress, so I respected her wishes. But then she didn’t want any physical interaction. No cuddling, no kissing. On top of that, she became increasingly distant. Her eating habits constantly changed. One evening, Julia demanded, “Mason, I need pickles and ice cream right now.” “Sure thing, honey,” I replied, hurrying to the store. When I returned, she snapped, “I don’t want this! I want sushi!”
She never let me go to any appointments or groups she attended. “It’s just easier if I go alone,” she insisted. “I don’t want you hovering over me.” “But I want to be involved, Julia,” I protested. “I said no, Mason!” she snapped. She spent more time away from home, became cold and bitter, and was constantly angry at me. This went on for months. One night, I came home exhausted. “Julia, I made dinner,” I called out. “I’m not eating that,” she said, eyeing the food with disdain. “But I spent hours making it,” I said, frustrated. “Do you ever think about what I want?” she shouted. “You never listen!” Then, she slapped me. I was stunned to the point of silence.
By the fifth week, I was doing everything. My work was also our primary source of income. I was barely sleeping, and running on fumes. She made me sleep in the guest room and always tried to pick fights. “Why don’t you just leave if you can’t handle this?” she would taunt. I never even raised my voice. I constantly reminded myself this wasn’t her and it would all be worth it. She didn’t want me to make any decisions regarding the baby. No name choices, no work on the nursery, nothing. One month before she delivered, Julia yelled at me about how useless I was. “I’m going to stay with my mother. Don’t bother calling,” she declared. She refused to let me get her anything, threatened to divorce me, and even threatened a restraining order if I called her.
A couple of weeks ago, I found out about the birth of my son, Jason, from a Facebook post. Julia posted it with her mother and some family. It broke me. When I tried to visit them at the hospital, security kicked me out. After finding out about Jason’s birth, I started doubting if Jason was mine. I wanted a paternity test, but Julia didn’t answer my calls. I was heartbroken. Two weeks later, Julia’s brother picked up the phone. “Mason, you need to know the truth,” he said. “Julia had an affair with a coworker. She believed the baby was his.” I was stunned. “What? How could she do this to me?” “She didn’t know how to tell you. Her coworker promised to be with her, but he left when he found out the baby wasn’t his,” her brother explained. “I thought you should know.”
When I found out about Julia’s betrayal, I was furious. With the help of my lawyer, I demanded a paternity test. When it was confirmed that I was indeed the father, I was finally able to hold my son for the first time when he was almost a month old. I then taught Julia a lesson. We had a prenup, and I owned our marital home. I filed for divorce and was confident that I would win. I also contacted Julia’s job and revealed her relationship with the coworker. Her company had strict rules and fired both Julia and the coworker.
I filed for full custody of Jason, claiming Julia wasn’t stable enough to provide for him. Julia begged me to forgive her, but I didn’t. She had no option left but to move in with her mother. Julia’s life changed drastically after moving in with her mother. The relationship between Julia and her mother became strained. “How could you let this happen, Julia?” her mother would often ask, frustration clear in her voice. “I made a mistake, Mom. I didn’t know it would turn out like this,” Julia would reply, her eyes welling up with tears. Her mother sighed, “Losing your job was one thing, but your actions have consequences. Look at where we are now.”
Julia struggled with the reality of her situation. Every day was a reminder of her fall from grace. Without a job, she had no financial independence. Her mother’s constant lectures didn’t help. “I can’t believe you jeopardized everything for a fling,” her mother said one evening, shaking her head in disbelief. “Mom, I’m trying to make things right,” Julia insisted. “Trying isn’t enough, Julia. You need to face the reality that you’ve hurt a lot of people,” her mother retorted. Their conversations were filled with tension and regret. Julia felt trapped and isolated. Her mother’s disappointment weighed heavily on her, making her realize the full impact of her decisions. Every day, she faced the reality of her actions and the life she had lost.
After hearing me out in court and learning my story, the judge granted me full custody, especially since Julia didn’t protest. I decided to move on with my life and become the best father I could be. I allowed Julia to see Jason according to the court arrangements. Was I justified in the lesson I taught my ex-wife?
